Poetry memories: Theodore Roethke

ack in ye olde college days, I took a couple of poetry classes. Not to sound too dramatic, but it really awoke in me a different way of appreciating the world, and how to fumble my way forward to write about it. One class was more analysis and critique, the other was actual poetry writing (which of course also had analysis and critique; it felt like dumping my soul out in front of a dozen other collegiates, horrors). In the analysis class, I was exposed to poets I hadn't previously heard of, and Theodore Roethke was one of them. I remember reading the poem below, one of his better-known poems, almost like it was yesterday.

The Waking 
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I feel my fate in what I cannot fear.
I learn by going where I have to go.

We think by feeling. What is there to know?
I hear my being dance from ear to ear.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.

Of those so close beside me, which are you?
God bless the Ground! I shall walk softly there,
And learn by going where I have to go.

Light takes the Tree; but who can tell us how?
The lowly worm climbs up a winding stair;
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.

Great Nature has another thing to do
To you and me; so take the lively air,
And, lovely, learn by going where to go.

This shaking keeps me steady. I should know.
What falls away is always. And is near.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I learn by going where I have to go.
Theodore Roethke

Our professor would bring in recordings of poets reading their own work, if possible, and I really enjoyed that part of the class. He showed an old and grainy video of Theodore Roethke, probably shot in the late '50s (the poem was published in 1953). In it, the poet leaned against a mantle, and as he recited the poem, he would sway back and forth, sort of using the mantle to hold on to. I loved his voice, which seemed a little monotone and sad (in fact, I remember learning the word dolorous in connection with Roethke, odd to remember so specifically), and I also loved how the swaying added to the overall melencholy.

I had high hopes of finding that exact video clip to share, but alas, all my interwebbing has turned up naught. So, here's his voice to the poem.



It never occurred to me that someone might take these words and turn them into a song. But in my YouTube wanderings, sure enough, I found a few versions of this song, which is now on repeat in my head (well parts of it, there are other parts that are a bit too note-chasing for me...). Could be an interesting way to memorize a poem, eh?



"The Waking" was brought back to my mind by The Writer's Almanac, which highlights so many good poems to my computer every week. (I highly encourage signing up.)

Do you have a poem or poet that stays with you, years later? Tell me, please!

Friday night grateful moment

o dearly wanting a nap right now, but as it is evening already, and will be actually time for bed when I finish this, more or less, I will forego the nap and just mention sleep/rest/chill time, oh, like 45 times or so in this post.

It's been a good week. A few bumps in the road, but nothing too mountainous. Just very very glad to be home, with both boys, and warm.

I posted the above picture to Facebook today, saying something along the lines of "really? still foggy?" and one dear commenter reminded me that I could possibly make my own sunshine. Yes, tis true, and I'm grateful for those reminders, even though we are a couple of weeks into this particular inversion, more or less. But it sure wouldn't hurt to have a little help!

sunshine

I'm grateful for people. People to laugh with, people to share with, people who love me and I love, people to work with and get things done with. People are good. Someone posted a song recently on Facebook, "People Are Crazy," and I watched the video. Funny, cute, and somewhat on point, but I am glad not to have too much crazy in my life. But songs titled "People Are Good" just aren't as catchy, I suppose.

I'm grateful for our pups. Darby is showing her age, and Chief has stepped it up in the neediness department lately--somehow I think in Jack's absence he has a heightened sense of what's to come with Darby, but maybe I'm imagining a brain cell or two more than reality... Regardless, they are sweet and unwavering in their affection, and I so appreciate them.

So grateful for my guys. Having them both home and tucked up for the weekend is just bliss to me.

Grateful for family, near and far. Got a call from my Grandma this week, and those always make me happy happy happy. They are getting shorter, the calls... I don't think her hearing works too well over the phone anymore. But, I'll take what I can get.

Music makes my world go round, quite often. I can't listen at work--I'm not doing the kind of work where that would even remotely be beneficial, so I have been listening in the car! In the mornings! This video popped up this week, and not only is it a Carpenter's song (!), but it's Zooey, so what more could one wish for?



I am grateful for music, always... the power of lyrics and the catchiness of some tunes. There can, indeed, be other tunes I am much less grateful for... anyone seen that ad from Toyota with Kelly Clarkson and a few grayhaired men (I think there's a food guy, James Lipton, and some sports dude?). Well, that song they burst into? Drives. Me. Nuts. I don't usually watch ads because we're blessed with dvr technology, and why watch ads when you can whiz past them? But maybe it was the Super Bowl? Something has made me watch a bit of live TV lately, and that ad seems to air a lot. Too. Much. Between that the the yelling JCPenney ad at the end of January? Crazy. Which ad wizard exactly thought that was a good idea? (OK this has taken on a rant quality, rather than a peaceful, grateful tone. I will stop. Now.)

I'm thankful for simple meals. This week we ate quite simply... soups, popcorn a couple of evenings, salads... quick to prepare, yummy to eat, not too time consuming. I'm all for time-consuming recipes, at times; and at other times, easy peasy pleasey.

I am grateful that it's not minus-something-or-other, even with this fog nonsense. At least there's that.

I ordered up a white board this week at work, so I could get a more visual sense of what we're working on. It really helped. I'd write, then take a picture with my iPhone, erase, start over using notes from the first version, and repeat. What did we do before our phones could capture things for us? So so helpful, I'm very grateful for technology that actually assists in the process, and for the ability to lean into a learning style (visual, for me) rather than chafe and fight against it.

I am really, really ready for summer fruit. Even spring fruit would be good--though I'm hard pressed to actually think of much that's any good before local strawberries in June... In the meantime, I am grateful for some variety in the winter fruits. Red pears are a big favorite around here; you have to get them on the right day or they go to mush, but we tend to stick toward the slightly crisp side, so we're usually safe! I like mixing up the apple/orange/banana routine a bit, for sure. And grapes? They're currently running in the $4-6/lb., so I think we'll be giving those a miss for a while!

I hope you have lovely things on tap for the weekend. Grateful things. Joyful things. Tell me what's going on with you, what you're grateful for, and if there's any sunshine where you're at!

Peace.

Thursday 13: Favorite Thursday 13s

ot a little carried away with looking at previous posts recently... one link led to another, to another, and so on. Which of course got me thinking, as Thursday approach... what have I posted for Thursday 13s in the past? Which were my favorite? I remember my very first Thursday 13, like it was yesterday... 3.5 years later, here we are. I like that I've stuck with the meme, and have certainly met a few lovely folks around the interwebs because of it (yes, you).(If you're new to this blog, Thursday 13 is a meme whereby people around the world share lists of 13 things on Thursdays, and go around and visit each other's lists.)

After a little looking around and getting distracted by some lovely walks down memory lane, here we are, in no particular order:

1. 13 favorite pictures of our trip to Hawaii, Dec. 9, 2010. A friend was recently on the Big Island, and I loved seeing her pictures and living vicariously through her adventures... this time of year, a beach and some sunshine sound sooooo goooood.

2. 13 favorite summer desserts, June 18, 2009. If I can't have summer, I can at least think about fabulous desserts with fresh fruit!

3. 13 favorite summer salads, July 23, 2009. Ditto to above. Yum, can't wait for summer eating!

4. 13 random things, Feb, 18, 2010. I seem to do random every once in awhile when the idea bank runs dry or I am simply out of time. This one brought back some happy memories, which I enjoyed thinking back on. From time to time I've also done the Simple Woman's Daybook as a Thursday 13, but I think of that as rather random, with a side of structure... good to pull out every once in awhile!

5. 13 favorite books from childhood, May 7, 2009. Again with happy memories!

6. 13 quotes, Sept. 29, 2009. I tend to post quotes fairly often. Additional quote-related T13 posts are here and here and here. There are also a few here and here and here. OK, seems I like the quotes a lot! That's by far the most posted-about Thursday 13 topic...

7. 13 tidbits about the royal wedding, April 28, 2011. I have such fond memories of spending this early-early morning time with dear friend Kate, and remembering another royal wedding from many, many years prior.

8. 13 wishes for Seth at his 8th grade graduation, June 9, 2011. Love that boy in his suit. So handsome and grown up! Reading back through those wishes, I got a little verklempt!

9. 13 rainbows for St. Patrick's Day, March 17, 2011. Who, me? Rainbows? Alas...

10. 13 random items of inspiration, Oct. 15, 2009. Remember the world before Pinterest? I know, me neither. But this is what it looked like, sort of... pretty images culled from various web sites. I know, I still do that kind of sharing here, but usually the images come from my Pinterest wanderings now. Heavens, life is easier in a Pinterest world, isn't it? It is certainly more beautiful, for sure.

11. 13 ways of looking at Seth, Oct. 1, 2009. This is probably one of my very favorites, the day Seth turned 13 and I wrote a la Wallace Stevens' Thirteen Ways of Looking at a Blackbird for his special day. Such good memories, some of the pictures I posted there as well...

12. 13 videos for your amusement, May 5, 2011. I know video posts are rather time consuming, but I do love to collect and share... I just can't help it!

13. 13 favorite Etsy shops, March 4, 2010. I've only done one other Etsy-related Thursday 13, just a couple of weeks ago, but I do like the "treasury" approach to Etsy, and now that I've got that figured out, I will do more of those! (source)

If you had the time to click through, which one was your favorite? What would you like to see more of (less of?)? I'd love to know!

For more Thursday 13s, go here! And have a great day, while you're at it.

Midweek reflection: Quiet sits with me when snow falls

wrote this poem almost exactly a year ago. Last night I saw it languishing in my drafts folder and with the fog of the past few days, I am compelled to finally share. It wasn't particularly foggy, per se, when I took the walk depicted below, but the gray was quite relentless, as it feels now.

I have been (very) shy with sharing this style of writing on the blog, but it's a way I do enjoy putting words together, and I appreciate when others share along a similar vein, so... here goes.

Snow prayer
Gray expanse of land
and air meet at the horizon in dull agreement.
Thick layers of fog and cloud
wrap the house, the pasture,
and spread across the valley,
up up up the hills
until they are pushed back
down by the sun, unseen below.

Cold in my chest but breathing
freely, I walk a brisk mile.
Hawks swoop, pheasants strut,
caught between seasons they eye me
through rows of forgotten grapes, across
damp acres of dirt, the promise
of wheat sprouts.

I yearn for snowflakes,
thick and fast.
Quiet sits with me
when snow falls. Blanketed
by soft flurries, the rushed world stills,
my anxious mind mothered
and soothed to sleep.

Give me the seclusion and distance
of snow for a little longer.
Insulation, denial.
Just one more snow, I beg.
A silent day, or two,
to pull the covers up, sit with myself.
This is my prayer
to the winter gods.

Ten Word Tuesday

Fog. Day six. Would really appreciate some sunshine. Please send.

Weekend link love

his internet round-up starts a little deep and ends with complete fluff. Just a warning. I thought about rearranging links, but figured you could handle the digression. Here are a few things that have caught my eye in the past week or so:

What's wrong with the teenage mind? Need I say more?

Two posts really spoke to me from my feeds: A reminder that things can change any day: Life is short, and this one, What I know now, about the little and big nuances that make up who we are.

The questions you ask yourself on a daily basis determine your focus, and your focus determines your results. Maybe that sounds a little self-helpy, but this post about 10 questions to ask yourself daily is a good straightforward way to look ahead.

What's wrong with the teenage mind? Hmmm. Need I say more? Thanks for the link, Kim. It's taken me a couple of years to catch on that indeed I DO have a teen, but I'm there now, and adjusting accordingly.

A blog I follow about a young man who suffered very devastating injuries in a car accident a few years back, Pray for Ian, posted that they're doing a fundraiser with these T-shirts. I thought I'd spread the word just a little further. Ian and Larissa are a sweet, God-fearing couple trying to make their way in this altered reality.

I somehow let today slip by without officially noting that it was World Nutella Day. I have lately been taken by this site that posts every food holiday and what day it is celebrated. Rather fun to know when Soup Day is, or Carrot Cake Day, just in case you were looking for menu ideas, you know.

Piecaken. This (above) must be attempted. Sooner rather than later. To not try would be completely unAmerican. (If you are of other nationality, you can just bring your distainful looks and come have piecaken at my house, you know you will.)

Bagel making, coming up!

Catching up on Slate: Wished-for changes to the modern keyboard (I completely concur on the need for an em dash!).

A couple of posts relative to the faith-filled life: the differences between religion and the gospel (drawn from the sermons of Tim Keller, yeah!) and a post by Donald Miller about church leadership, which I really appreciated.

Ever wanted to know who the top 100 jewelry sellers on Etsy are? Here they are!

So the Downton Abbey obsession continues... a Facebook friend posted a quiz just today: "Which Downton Abbey character are you?" with some humorous questions to answer. I turned up as Anna (the head housemaid, if you're not yet a fan) and Alan came up Matthew Crawley (duh, of course! Matthew's the new heir and one of the main men.). Take the quiz yourself. I'd love to know which character you are!

And further down the soapy end of the spectrum is the new-ish ABC show Revenge. Pretty much fluff of the finest fluff. I find this fan tribute video quite campy and humorous.



And since I can't actually bring myself to post anything fluffier than that last bit, I'll just call it good with that!

Hope you have enjoyed a lovely weekend, and that wherever you are you got to enjoy a bit more sunshine than we had. Other than a glorious two-hour sunshine break today, we wallowed in a bowl of fog all weekend. Ready for the inversion to end, for sure.

My first Etsy treasury: For the love of green

tsy treasuries have been around for quite a while; I really don't know why I haven't played with making one before--whole sites/blogs have been dedicated to the curation of Etsy pretties around a theme. (Though, for the life of me, I cannot recall the name of the most famous one... it will come to me, maybe. See: my brain gratitude from yesterday... ha ha.)

I believe, in looking at the how-to information on the Etsy blog, it's gotten easier over time to fill in the template and save, so maybe it's good I waited so long? Regardless, I just got a bee in my bonnet and decided today is the day!

I named this first treasury after my Pinterest board with the same leanings: For the love of green. It's true that green and I still have a bit of a love affair after all these years. Maybe it's not as passionate as it once was, but the flame still burns... nothing says fresh and springy like a board of green!

Here's the link to find the treasury on Etsy.

Here's the link to my "For the love of green board" on Pinterest.

Here's a reality check: In the 32 minutes since I posted my treasury, 82 (EIGHTY TWO!) additional treasuries have been curated and posted, moving mine back 5 pages. By the time you see it, who knows!

Friday night grateful moment

ly, little week, fly!

This week was a quick one, for sure. No sitting around wondering if we're at Thursday and it's only Wednesday... zoom zoom.

And here we are at Friday night. What what what to be grateful for? Hmmm. So much, but where to start?

Maybe it's because of the foggy day, or the time of year, but color is something that I am particularly grateful for right now. I culled a few of my more memorably colorful Pins of late, to share with you. I have interspersed them throughout my grateful list, just for kicks. I know, hang onto your hats, it's a wild night!

what fun to make these crochet balls

I'm grateful for my brain. I thought of this a number of times this week--especially when I completely spaced the name of someone I know well enough, as she was walking toward me. It was right there, right at the tip of my tongue, and I could not recall it. So that might make you think I should not be grateful for the current state of my brain, but the truth is, if that happens to me I know that my brain is full-up with other stuff. Which it currently is. All kinds of stuff like data fields and organizational structures and lists and print outs and schedules. So names of people I see every few months? Not so much. Thankfully I covered, well enough, I hope.

 I'd love this chair anywhere in my house!

Emotional resilience is something I'm thankful to have a helping of. There have been varying opinions on my resilience; I've been told I'm extremely resilient, I've been told I'm somewhat resilient, and I've been told I'm not even remotely resilient. All at different times in my life, by different people. Maybe I was those things, at that time. What I know at this moment is that I am resilient. I bounce back. Depending on the situation, it might take me a minute or two (or three), but I'll get there. I will usually find a way to look on the bright side, and barring any bright side at all, I will pragmatically slog through to a way to deal with whatever is in my path. With an understanding (faith) that allows me to believe in a bigger picture beyond my little circumstances on this particular day.

 salad that makes me dream of summer...

The above leads me to list faith as something I'm grateful for. Seth and I talk about faith quite a bit, usually in the evening, as we are having our winding down conversations before bed. I've shared my path, somewhat in generalities, in other ways quite specifically, and this last week I told him more concretely what my path back to faith looked like. I've thought about writing it here, but as it is intensely personal, I am reluctant and shy. Reading the multi-post story by hollywood housewife last weekend really made me think about it more seriously--at least writing it down for myself, and then shoring up the courage to share. We'll see.

  rainbow pompoms across my ceiling, yes please!

I'm so so grateful for sunny days. Today was not one of those, it was foggy and cold and everything the groundhog foretold. But yesterday, the day of the shadows, the sunshine was fierce. I am not yet back in the habit of having sunglasses with me at all times, so my squinting was a bit intense, but I would not complain, no way. I have great doubts about six more weeks of anything resembling winter, and am hopeful that more sun is on the way!

adorable dotty boots

My men. I am grateful for husband and his appreciation, affection and our laughter together. I will admit that sometimes I say some pretty crazy things, just to get him to laugh. But it's totally worth it! I am also grateful for my teenager, even though there are times lately I think I might be going a little nuts with some of his arguments and reasoning. Thankfully, his sweetness and affection still comes through.

My sourdough starter did what it was supposed to do, and I'm grateful it worked. I suppose I might be stepping out too quickly as I haven't actually used it yet, but it behaved as the recipe said it was supposed to, and now it awaits whatever concoction I choose to create this weekend. I've read that it takes a while to get really sourdoughy, so I'll be patient for those baguettes I adore...

 

sweet crochet slippers

I'm grateful to live in a community. I have only lived briefly in an urban environment, and while I imagine that there would be things to enjoy and appreciate in that setting, I am quite happy in a smaller community where--having been here now 25+ years--I can see friends and acquaintances quite readily. I have some friends that do not enjoy that particular aspect of small town life, but for me, it makes the flip side--imagining (or just plain knowing) that everyone knows your business--more palatable.

  let's take rainbow cake to the next level!

Living in a beautiful community is wonderful too. I'm grateful we have hills (with snow!) to look out on, and that the storms that come up the valley or over the mountains are interesting to watch, and also that the horizon off to the west provides us with beautiful sunsets on many evenings. We have had some amazing sunsets this winter!

I'm grateful for sleep, and for the promise of extra sleep over the weekend. I feel like I've been on the short end of the sleep stick for a few weeks now, so looking to fix that with some sweet snoozes.

colorful dress, what joy!

I'm grateful for friends, near and far. The variety of ways we keep in touch, whether it's frequent or infrequent, never fail to make my day better. I had a friend leave me a voice message recently that laughingly said my day job was cutting into her ability to call and have me pick up any old time, which is true! So seeing friends and communicating is a bit different at the moment, but very worth my time and energy.

 talk about a wake-me-up shower: rainbow tile!

makes me want to knit!

I really tried not to make it too rainbow oriented, really, I did. But oh those tones, they do speak to me...

For me, the weekend will involve sleep, reading, quiet time/prayer/meditation, cooking/baking, naps (separate from sleep, of course), eating of the cooking/baking, maybe even a little exercise, some office cleaning/organization, bill paying, more naps, a little football (if it gets interesting), movie night with husband, possibly some craft time (especially if the football doesn't get interesting)... all very precious to me, this time and space of the weekend.

I hope your weekend involves all the things you hope for. Peace.

Thursday 13: Daybook musings

t's been a while since I've done a Simple Woman's Daybook for Thursday 13, so I thought I'd trot it out... imagine my surprise that they have mixed it up a bit, and there are more than 13 items to fill out. Oh dear. Not to be deterred, I've edited it down to the 13 that I want to answer, with a bonus picture. Welcome to MY version of the daybook, I guess...

FOR TODAY

1. Outside my window... I am ready for earlier sunrises. It's 6:42 a.m. and still dark. Not a fan.

2. I am thinking... that some weeks fly by, and some weeks don't. This is one of the fly weeks.

3. I am thankful... for so much. Health and happiness, the ability to see the glass half full. Having a glass that actually IS half full most days.

4. In the kitchen... I made a rockin' s'mores recipe this week--will post soon-ish--and my sourdough starter is on its last day of bubbling. Excited to see what develops there! Other than that, and some hummus I made earlier this week, we are very much on a tacos-homemade pizza-pasta-lentil soup rhythm around here... The weekend is a good time to bust out of that!

5. I am wearing... work clothes! A dress! Boots! How's that for a different take on the usual "fuzzy robe and slippers?" Ah well, I do enjoy the productive feeling of work-work.

6. I am creating... some Valentine-y things... for here with my men, and for a couple of packages too. Oh, and there's the languishing crochet. Need to finish one thing, and continue on with another...

7. I am going... to lunch at a new local restaurant today. It's breakfast food all day, apparently. I am looking forward to checking it out. Called Bacon and Eggs. Sounds good, anyway, right?! We have had a couple new local joints open lately, makes me feel like there's some hope for the economy, right?

8. I am wondering... when I will be back into the rhythm of the work day enough that I'm not completely tuckered at the end of each day. And I'm not even working full days. But the interactions with people are way more than I'm used to, usually, and I have found my energy drained by the end of the day. End of the week too... While I don't think I've become an introvert in the classic sense, I have certainly gotten used to my quiet home rhythms. But I know I'll get used to these other rhythms too, it will just take a bit of time. (At least I haven't picked up some nasty bug yet, knock on wood!)

9. I am reading... Floor Sample and My Year of Wishful Thinking. It may be just a touch too memoir-y... may need to mix it up a bit. Seth and I just finished The Reason for God (highly recommend! Timothy Keller again. Big fan.) started Mere Christianity and Searching for God at Harvard... read the intros to both, now we'll decide which to read first, then maybe follow up with the other.

10. I am looking forward to... the weekend. Kind of an obvious answer (especially after #8 above), but it really works for me right now. Peace, quiet, napping, crafts, husband time. What more could a girl wish for? Also, before the weekend, coffee with a girlfriend Friday morning before work. Definitely looking forward to that.

11. I am learning... a lot, in regards to the project I'm working on at work. Lots to learn, but so far it's been the good kind. (Not sure what the bad kind is... maybe when it's slow going on actually processing the information?) I am also learning bits and pieces (I'm a little slower here, I'm convinced) about parenting a teenager. It's a whole new (brave) world. I had a couple of years of being lulled into thinking "attitude" wouldn't happen around here. Ha. I'm learning.

12. A favorite quote for today... This one came across my desk just yesterday, and it resonated. Pema knows how to get to the heart of things:
Don’t worry about achieving. Don’t worry about perfection. Just be there each moment as best you can. When you realize you’ve wandered off again, simply very lightly acknowledge that. This light touch is the golden key to reuniting with our openness. -Pema Chodron

13. One of my favorite things... right now, this very moment? It's Downton Abbey. I'm just plain hooked. I know, I know, so is the rest of America, we poor Anglophile fools. Nonsense! I say. Just like rainbows and owls and cupcakes (and how ridiculously popular they've become), I liked BBC productions long before this particular one. And this one? Crazy good. Entirely soapy. Fabulous drama. Angst and happiness and unrequited love. Yep. Be still my heart.

Bonus: A peek into my day... 

What is there NOT to love about this picture? A little fig tree that, until recently, had appeared to be gonzo, now in full leaf... in the SUNSHINE. Such is the bliss around here. OK, so that heat register... not so much love that I didn't move the fig to get THAT out of the picture. But it is what it is--that heat is a big reason the fig is doing so well. On the other side of the heat register is my plumeria... still in its winter hibernation mode, but I trust leaves will sprout there soon as well.

Hope your Thursday is going well. Thanks for taking a peek at my somewhat random, but a wee bit ordered, life!

To see other Thursday 13 participants, go here.

To play along with the Simple Woman's Daybook, go here.

Midweek reminder: Wind the clock

30 March 1973
Dear Mr. Nadeau:

As long as there is one upright man, as long as there is one compassionate woman, the contagion may spread and the scene is not desolate. Hope is the thing that is left to us, in a bad time. I shall get up Sunday morning and wind the clock, as a contribution to order and steadfastness.

Sailors have an expression about the weather: they say, the weather is a great bluffer. I guess the same is true of our human society—things can look dark, then a break shows in the clouds, and all is changed, sometimes rather suddenly. It is quite obvious that the human race has made a queer mess of life on this planet. But as a people we probably harbor seeds of goodness that have lain for a long time waiting to sprout when the conditions are right. Man's curiosity, his relentlessness, his inventiveness, his ingenuity have led him into deep trouble. We can only hope that these same traits will enable him to claw his way out. Hang on to your hat. Hang on to your hope. And wind the clock, for tomorrow is another day.

Sincerely,
(Signed, 'E. B. White')
source